A Candle for Christopher on World Suicide Prevention Day

World Suicide Prevention Day has a deeply personal meaning for me. Since losing my stepdaughter, Kathy, to suicide in 2022, I have learned that suicide prevention is not only about raising awareness; it is also about remembering the people we have lost, supporting those left behind, and choosing compassion whenever we have the opportunity. I know what it feels like to want someone to say Kathy’s name, remember how she lived, and see her as so much more than the way she died. That is why, when another suicide loss parent from Instagram (Stephanie,) asked her friends and followers to light a candle for her son, Christopher, on World Suicide Prevention Day, I knew I wanted to light one too.

That evening, I lit a candle for Christopher and placed it beside a small painting I had created after watching The Boy, the Mole, the Fox and the Horse a few months after Kathy died. I took a photograph of the candle and found myself thinking about Christopher; not only about his death, but about the person I had come to know through the stories and posts his mom shares. I sat down and wrote him a letter. I wrote about the love Stephanie continues to send his way, the memories she shares, and how, because of her, people who never had the opportunity to meet Christopher still know his name.

When I sent Stephanie the letter and the photograph, she told me they were treasures she would cherish forever. But what touched me most was when she thanked me for seeing and acknowledging her son. I understood exactly what she meant. As parents and families grieving a suicide loss, we never want the person we love to become only a statistic or a story about suicide. They had names. They had personalities, dreams, favorite foods, laughter, quirks, friendships, and people who loved them deeply. They lived, and remembering how they lived matters.

That experience reminded me that we don’t have to do something extraordinary to make a difference, but we do have to do something. Light a candle. Say their name. Listen to a grieving parent tell the same story again. Check on someone who has been quiet. Learn the warning signs. Start a conversation about mental health. Offer kindness without being asked. Sometimes what feels like a small gesture to us can mean everything to someone else. World Suicide Prevention Day may be one day on the calendar, but the compassion behind it can and should continue every day.

Below is the letter I wrote to Christopher and attached is the photo.

All the best!

Michelle Boodoo, Ph.D.

CEO / Founder

Hi Christopher,

I know your name because of your mom.

She tells us stories about you, about the person you were and the kindness you carried. Through her words, those of us who never had the privilege of meeting you have come to know a little piece of you. She shares her memories, lights candles for you, and still notices the things you would have loved. She writes to you: “Hey son, it’s me,” and “I miss you, son.” She sends love, birthday wishes, Christmas wishes, hugs, and even love balloons towards the heavens for you. In everything she shares, one thing is always true: you are deeply loved.

Yesterday, on World Suicide Prevention Day, your mom asked people around the world to light a candle for you. And they did. In homes near and far, candles of different sizes, colors, and scents were lit. And every flame had something in common: it knew your name...Christopher.

This was the candle I lit for you. I placed it beside a small painting I made after watching The Boy, the Mole, the Fox and the Horse a few months after my Kathy died. That beautiful story found me during one of the darkest times of my own grief. Its gentle reminders about love, friendship, kindness, asking for help, and finding the courage to keep going stayed with me. And somehow, it felt like the right place for your candle…..a little light beside an image that reminds us that even when the journey becomes difficult, love can walk beside us.

So, Christopher, although I never met you, I know your name. I know you were an amazing son and a beautiful person because your mom makes sure the world continues to know you. She carries your love forward every time she speaks your name, tells one of your stories, or lights another candle.

And Stephanie, yesterday, Christopher’s name traveled farther than you may ever know, from your heart into homes around the world.

One of those homes was mine.

Christopher's candle burned in my home. His name was spoken in my home. And he was remembered in my home.

May every candle lit for him be a reminder that love continues to shine…even through the darkest times.

Michelle ❤️